Posts in Goals
2019: Time for a Change

I spent the better part of 2018 trying to convince myself that I was okay with being where I am. Sometimes I believed it. Sometimes I just wanted to go back in time and start over. I have found that being in the present and focusing on improving each day is where I should be but the way I frame that in my mind needs to change. Reflecting on this last year I have a lot to be thankful for but performance wise, I was not there. I been marathoning for a year, progressing a little bit each time but I started way off where I wanted to be. As 2018 came to a close I just knew, it was time for a change. Read on for my outlook and plan for 2019.

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2018 Indianapolis Monumental Marathon

I have spent the last couple of days processing what happened. Trying to figure out how to deal with it. How to move past the experience. How to continue to move towards my goal. How to stay confident. It has been hard. I was ready and capable to run sub 2:45 on Saturday. I was doing it. The marathon is a beast. You can be in the best shape of your life and lose it in the final 5k. Mentally I needed this. I came up a bit short. But I have more opportunity and a team of people to help get me there. Time to keep fighting.

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Training Update

For the first 4 months of this year I was just going through the motions. Following my training, going to the gym, meeting with my strength coach, and getting PT. I was maintaining everything but it all felt stagnant. In February we tried to dive back into normal training and my body couldn't handle it. I couldn't even make easy runs feel easy. For a while I was just desperately looking for answers which affected me mentally. I went to a doctor who made me feel like everything was in my head. In moments of weakness I believed him and felt like this was it. Maybe this is just where I am now. But, between my functional medicine doctor and my primary care doctor we finally figured it out. I used Jasyoga's Work-IN to stay centered and now here I am. With 3 weeks to go to Grandmas, I know I can do this.

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My Prologue 2018

Everybody has a story. It's just up to you how you tell it. I've had my fare share of disappointments in my running career but I haven't let those times define me, I've chosen to help them shape me. Lets just say my stubbornness has forced me to learn the hard way many times. But now I am on a mission to let go of some of the control, have faith in the process, learn to relax, work hard but recover better, and love who I am and what I have got. I read an article by Allie Kiefer a week or so ago and it resonated with me. I've obsessed over food, feeling bad about the fact that I am not as skinny as most runners. I've felt what she felt and it's kept me from reaching my potential. But that stops now. 2018 is my year to shine. Starting with the events of the last month and my plans for the next year, this is #MyProlouge.

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